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I keep saying Yes to almost, everything. I need start using No’s more. Just for my own good.

So that my time stays with me and won’t get divulged in some random acts of helping people who’re ungrateful. Who, acknowledge your presence just for the sake of getting their things done. Until then, you were the most despised guy around.

cc licensed flickr photo shared by smlp.co.uk

I ditched the post I was writing about the Indira Gandhi assassination and decided that something lesser on the brain cells would be better! Bear with me, while I rant.

cc licensed flickr photo shared by Orin Zebest

This is about me, as it should be. I’m looking inward, nowadays, in the wake of a certain phone call.

I’ve shifted my sleep cycles for the comfort of watching more movies and reading more books. And, reading more Tehelka. I’ve locked myself away from being the guy who sits at the computer day through night.

More read. Less feed. That seems to be my mantra now. I’m thinning now. From the fat guy I once used to be.

To me, waiting has become the hardest thing to do. Okay, I’m a man of patience, for the sake of it. There’s absolutely no need for to wait for ‘perfection’ if spontaneity can capture the creativity in the situation.

Unless, waiting becomes a subconscious thing that’s pushed to the background. While other more important interesting things happen that involve you to the point that you forget that you’ve cased the ‘waiting bit’ in a far far way place. Think of it, without even the hope of something happening, there’s just sadness underneath the process of waiting, if at all you’re a person who wouldn’t pack away your emotions, as well.

To present a different take, I’ve heard people (read: photographers, cinematographers) say the importance of waiting for certain time of the day, when the light is ‘just perfect’ (say, Golden hour), so that you can take the ‘just perfect’ shot. To me, that even is acceptable. That has the hope of getting something good.

But, how important is it to wait for something past that certain time when the light is good or when someone’s creativity is at its peak to get something desirable and worthy of what you are trying to achieve?

See more photos @flickr

Self-discovery is a surreal endurance for me. It’s already been found out. And, to pack up and go on a journey is so obvious to the conscious mind, that I think it won’t open up the way it should: and reveal the list of things you should be “really doing” than to waste time “pursuing mindless jobs”.

My way of going at it is to subject yourself to various journeys at the same: just the start of those journeys should be a conscious effort; the journey of the real journey should be left on its own, to surprise us with a little magic.

The point is to change course when you begin to feel the unhappiness digging into you. Maybe there’s a better race road out there. A journey that will make you happier.